so I’m reading Lord of the Rings fanfic, right, because marathoning the movies will do that to me, and I come across one that’s like “DARK FUTURE WHERE ARAGORN TAKES THE RING!” I am intrigued, and click on it. I’m a page or so in, and it’s disappointingly mediocre, until I come across this.
“You are so humble, Aragorn, and so modest. You don’t see your own beauty. You don’t see how truly wonderful you are.”
…and my brain finishes it with
BABY YOU LIGHT UP MY WORLD LIKE NOBODY ELSE
THE WAY THAT YOU FLIP YOUR HAIR GETS ME OVERWHELMED
and I can’t read anymore because now it’s stuck in my head but that’s okay because this is the best laugh I’ve had all day
but then my cat walks in
sees me laughing
turns around
and walks back out
I was just judged by my cat. I can’t tell what it was for, though. Was she like, “reading fanfic at your age, honestly” or “What Makes You Beautiful? Really?” or “stop laughing, it wasn’t that funny and you’re just making an ass of yourself” or even “Lord of the Rings fanfic is so 2003, who even writes it anymore” or even “your ship isn’t canon and never will be, how dare you sully Tolkien’s masterpiece with your slash.” Any of these are possibilities for cat judgment.
I’ll never be able to listen to that song again.